It’s a New Day

I know it’s been a long time since I’ve blogged and thank you to the few who still check in from time to time. I have been very nervous, silently worrying myself, planning for bad news. It was time for my first CT scan since I started this whole ordeal with cancer, and every twinge or ache had me convinced that I had cancer running rampant through my body. So I was ready for serious meds by the time my appointment rolled around to get the results. Leading up to that I was on a cleaning spree – throwing away all those things I had draggd around with me from California – the things that nobody would be interested in after my death. In a way, I was preparing…Morbid, huh? Well, the good news is, that I remain cancer free!!! Everything looked good – all my vital organs, my blood tests, everything. I was so relieved, happy, ecstatic. I wanted to run home, celebrate, tell people my good news. I had a hard time getting hold of anyone, and after awhile the euphoria wore off. The good news – I’m gonna live. The bad news – I think I threw something away that I might want now that I’m gonna live. I can now plan beyond tomorrow and that is a good thing. I know I still need to be careful and watchful, that the possibility that this will come back in some form is rather likely, but for now, I’m alive and that’s all that matters.

The Homecoming

This weekend I travel to Boston to meet Sheryl as she returns from a year in Spain.  It is very emotional for me, as I’m sure it will be for her. Although I saw her in March, and we talked or web-chatted almost everyday, I am happy to know she will be closer to home, easy to reach, a short flight away. I know for her that leaving Spain will be bittersweet. On the one hand, she seems ready to tackle her senior year, on the other hand she is leaving a country and people that have become dear to her. Hopefully we will get through these next few days and she will adjust to being back in Waltham.

I will get to visit my sister and her family, too. I am looking forward to that, as I haven’t seen my sister since she came to help me through my surgery. And Sheryl and Emma will meet up again after having a good time together in Spain.

It will be a hectic few days – there are some basic things that Sheryl needs to get done before moving in to her dorm/apartment on Tuesday. I fly home Wednesday. But it will be fun – and I’m sure we will talk a lot and have some good meals together.

So things have settled down on the homefront. My problems with Roxy are resolved and I am keeping her in her kennel while I’m at work without access to the outside. She seems very happy with the arrangement and it has relieved a lot of stress for me. Now we are good company for each other, although she is always in the way when I am cooking. We’ve had some interesting weather – some hot and humid days, followed by some major rain and storms, and now it’s on the cool side again. I just love that the weather changes around here from day to day.

I am still on this mission to simplify and I continue to throw away a lot of stuff that I have kept around for years. Old yellowed pictures from college of  people whose names I barely remember are going in the trash. Old papers, souvenirsthat haved moved with me from place to place no longer seem to amuse me. It is more refreshing to throw stuff away than to keep it.

I hope Sheryl comes home to Mankato by the end of September. Then my cousin will visit in October, November will be Thanksgiving, and then Jacob wants us to visit him in December.  Well, he really wants to rent a place for a week in the mountains so he can ski, and if I come I can cook and help him pay for it. So, why not? Then hopefully to break up the winter I will visit California in January or February. Sounds like the months will just fly by!

Hope all my readers have had a great summer. I can’t believe it’s almost over.

A Poem

Hello blog readers. It’s been a long time since I posted anything new. That’s because summer has been rambling on, nothing much is happening and there wasn’t much to tell. So here is a little update. I continue to enjoy my two book clubs – one that is general fiction/non-fiction and the other that is with the Jewish community of Mankato so the books are either by Jewish authors or have a Jewish theme. The last books we read were Girl with the Dragon Tattoo and Yiddish Policemen’s Union, respectively. I continue to enjoy my neighbors – last weekend they had a shrimp boil for about 25 people and on the Thursday prior to that we all shucked and then prepared 35 dozen ears of corn for freezing. That was fun and I was sick after that becuase I think I ate too much corn. I continue to volunteer at the library and Roxy continues to drive me crazy. She keeps digging her way out of the yard, then just waits on the deck for me to come home.

So, why is the title of the blog “A Poem?” Well, today I  was feeling a little depressed – Roxy’s chronic escapades, one of the sensors on my garage door broke (Roxy), and the floor drain in my garage is plugged. I’ve been tired and cranky, there was some drama at the library over missing money, and I otherwise just felt like crap. Too much time on my hands means that I think about every ache and pain and wonder if it is some new form of cancer that I have. It also finally (sadly) got hot and humid here, so not very pleasant.

When this is what your life is like, if you are me there is only one solution. It has nothing to do with sticking my head in an oven, either. No, I e mail my sister and tell her to write me a poem, to put things in perspective and give me a laugh, too. And she came through for me as I knew she would. So, here it is, I hope you get a laugh the way I did.  After reading this I felt fine.

There is a disease runnin’ round my brain,

The sickness of humidity and imaginary pain,

Triggered by a garage door or a clogged drain,

And Roxy, the dog I did not train.

Add to this loneliness and age,

Accused of petty thievery, I felt rage

Angst, worry, reality can become so hard to gauge.

So I turn to my sister, for she is sage.

 

Here is what she has to teach

Perfection in life is always just out of reach

We look for answers and who we can beseech

Go within, for that is all that you can reach

 

I guess the heat has left me in a fog.

I know the drain soon will be unclogged.

And content I’ll be, just me and my dog.

Thriller

OK, so a homage to the King of Pop, not necessarily a description of my life. But I did have a fabulous weekend with my friend Michelle. You may be dying to hear what we did, but I guess what everyone loves about visting me is that there’s not much to do, so relaxing is in order. Her flight was on time so we went to Edina for lunch at the Edina Grille. It’s a cute little place with shops and restaurants all around. After lunch we took off for Mankato. We talked non-stop the whole way. And of course she loved my house. Did I mention it was also about 20 to 30 degrees cooler in Minnesota than in Phoenix? Always a plus. There was a party at my neighbors, but we only stayed a short while. We headed back to my house and sat on the porch and talked some more. The next moring, I made Spanish tortilla for breakfast, then we drove around Mankato, and stopped out at Joe’s house. He wasn’t home but I wanted her to see where he lived. There were about 8 wild turkeys roaming around his yard, which was pretty funny. Actually watching Michelle jump out of my car and chase them with a camera was even funnier. Then we drove around, did some shopping and headed home for margueritas and guacamole. That of course made us tired so we napped, watched a movie and went to bed. The fact that Michelle took a four hour nap made it a late evening!

Sunday was more of the same. Sunday evening Jann and her girls came over for dinner and I grilled steak, shrimp, ribs and made home made mac and cheese. We ate on the porch because it was so beautiful outside. Monday I had to take her to the airport. Lots of crying on the way, and I was very sad and depressed when she left. I hope she and Marshall will come for a visit maybe even during winter. I definitely will plan on visiting her when I am sick of the cold here. She is just so wonderful to be around, and such a terrific friend. I missed her as soon as I pulled away from the airport.

So for anyone who wants a relaxing weekend with good food, great surroundings and an excuse to just relax, please come and visit me. I’ll even leave the light on for you.

The End of an Affair

I’ve just about had it. What before had been Mr. Reliable is no more. I had gone to sleep each night and started each day the same way for years, but it is over now. I have been left frustrated, angry and now just totally deflated. On Monday night, my cable box in my bedroom just quit on me – left me alone with nothing to show for the years of support I’d given it. The many phone calls provided no reconciliation. Our relationship was over.

I am somewhat of a TV junkie, so this was devestating. I also love to fall asleep with the TV on – I find it very relaxing to just roll over and hear the voices drone on in the background. So Tuesday I was at the cable store, getting a new, different box. This one and I have had a very rocky relationship thus far. It was new, worked differently and I’ve had a hard time adjusting. It does not respond to my commands, but ha a mind of its own. It has been an ongoing source of frustration and I want my old one back. This has put me in a foul mood all week, as I have spent numerous minutes on the phone, trying to develop the new relationship. It was just not meant to be.  Today the cable guy is coming to my house. I hope I get my old flame back – I am ready to kick this new one to the curb.

Haapy Fourth of July to all. I plan on enjoying the company of my friend Michelle, watching tennis, cooking and drinking. Hopefully I will be in a new and better relationship…with my cable box. Otherwise, I may have to turn to more drinking…or reading…not bad choices…

Summertime

The heat and humidity have arrived here with a vengeance. We have had rain/thunderstorms almost everyday for the last week. And when it’s not raining, the humidity just hangs in the air. It is summertime in Minnesota. Maybe that’s why I seem so tired. I just get lazy in the afternoons and at night I’ve been sleeping really well.

I am feeling better and better each day. I feel like my energy level is getting back to normal, although this past Sunday I slept a lot.Roxy continues to challenge me- she always finds a way to escape her spacious yard and I keep pounding more plywood up to try to thwart her efforts.  She has become a house dog, which isn’t so bad except that she follows me everywhere and always seems to be underfoot, especially when I am in the kitchen.

I am missing my old friends but the good news is that Michelle is coming in a week. I will be busy this weekend getting the house ready. And for those who remember the new “friend” I encountered just before I moved from Burbank…..well, that person called me yesterday out of the blue after not hearing from that individual for three years! We talked for over 45 minutes and I must say it was nice.

So…that’s all for now.

It’s a Long Way

I made the journey to California, expecting to spend time with my father and have some fun with my cousin. It didn’t all work out quite the way I planned. My cousin was seriously ill, in the hospital, so I spent as much time with her as I could. I still saw my father and spent time with him, too, and managed to take care of some of the business I wanted to do, including cleaning a little at his house and getting some documents together. Without violating my cousin’s privacy, let’s just say it was an emotionally trying time for me, not to mention a serious struggle for her. I am happy to report that she is quickly recovering, so I will plan another trip soon so we can do what we had wanted to originally.

I arrived back in Mankato on Monday night, and picked Roxy up on Tuesday. She was elated to see me – so happy that after she got home, all she could think of was being in the house with me. Since I wasn’t home (I was back at work) she broke out of her large yard and tried to get in the house on her own. The only thing she succeeeded in doing was ripping the screens on my two doors to shreds. This is payback for leaving her. I am always wondering what she will plan the next time.

The weather has turned warm and humid. We’ve had a lot of rain and some tornado warnings. My former neighbor brought me some pheasant to cook. I am anxious to see how it comes out. And congratulations to my neighbors – Pat and Craig – on the birth of their first grandchild, a boy. I got to hold him last night and he is adorable. A great way to take my mind off the events of last week.

P.S.

All went well at the doctor’s. Blood work is fine. I will have a scan in three months and hope that the results are clear.

Nothing New

I have nothing new to report. I have no funny observations. Life is good, the weather here is beautiful, although we desperately need rain. My grass is browning up a little because we have had only hints of rain for the past few weeks. I have not had to run my air conditioning, my windows are open and there is no humidity which means no bugs!

The only bug I have is Roxy, who keeps escaping from her beautiful yard and barking at everyone she sees. I hope I have closed her escape routes but she is one determined dog.

So, tomorrow I see the doctor for a routine check-up. I hope afterwards that I still have nothing new to report. Feeling pretty good, just joint pain and stiffness. The mind seems to be functioning better, my multi-tasking abilities are returning and I don’t seem so overwhelmed by things.

I appreciate you still checking my blog, and hope to have more to report. I will be in California next weekend- just a quick trip to visit my father.

Last Night

I couldn’t get to sleep at all….I was having the hardest time falling asleep and then I had quite an interesting night. It has been beautiful in Mankato lately – nice temperatures, no humidity, light breeze. Everything is so green, birds chirping, rabbits and squirrels frolicking.  I had a wonderful Memorial Day weekend. I did some volunteer work on Saturday – at the library and then feeding the hungry with other members of the Jewish community at the Salvation Army. We fed over 85 people. They were very appreciative, but it saddens me, especially when you see children. The rest of the weekend I just hung around – cooking, baking, cleaning up around the house, etc. Watched some movies, took naps…All in all a great weekend.

So, about last night. I was tossing around, and finally fell asleep around 11:30 only to be awakened 30 minutes later by some owls whoo-ing back and forth. Then started the mating calls – something like a cross between the sounds that cats, coyotes and screech monkeys make. That went on for about 10 or 15 minutes. Then I had to try to fall asleep again. Two hours later there was a huge POP and one of the transformers in our neighborhood blew. (This same thing happened on Sunday…I hear it’s the squirrels…) Anyway, the power went out, it was pitch black and Roxy freaked out. She started pacing, checking the house, making sure I was OK. She hates loud noises. She finally calmed down, and I finally fell back to sleep. About 2 1/2 hours later the power was restored. For some reason, my i pod, which sits in one of those docking stations with speakers, decided to turn on along with the power, so I had music blasting from my living room. I had to get up and shut that off, then finally I fell back to sleep until about 6:45am at which time I got up and got ready for work. Needless to say, I am a bit tired today.

I am feeling OK – getting some twitching in my surgery site, which I understand is fairly common. It’s more annoying than painful, although sometimes it does jab me. I was trying to remember what my weekends were like in California – I don’t remember having so much time to relax, but I guess I was still busy with the kids, or at least with Sheryl. I will be going to California in a few weeks, and I almost hate to be away during this time of year. It is almost the beginning of June, and by August it starts cooling off again. I’ve forgotten all about winter…..